Saturday, June 19, 2010
How to Decode Job Ads
With unemployment rates remaining at their highest rates in decades, as a public service to job seekers, I am offering list of explanations on what commonly used terms in job postings really mean.
Unlimited income potential – pays straight commission
Flex time – prepare to work crazy hours and weekends
Seniority based – you start at the bottom, regardless of experience
Telecommute – you’ll have to work at home too!
The successful applicant will… - if this isn’t on your resume, don’t bother
Some travel required – prepare to live out of your suitcase
Marketing – sales
Pay commensurate with experience – we’ll pay you as little as we can get away with
Some benefits – not many
Health plan – band-aids and Tylenol are available in the employee lounge
Inside marketing – telephone sales
Opportunities for advancement – high employee turnover
Retirement plan – we pay into Social Security for you
Independent contractor – no benefits, not even Social Security
Entry level – low pay
Internship – no pay
Rapidly growing company – prepare to work long hours and do more than you get paid for
Established company – not growing and nearly bankrupt
Good customer service skills – someone who doesn’t scream at the customers
Great customer service skills – someone who doesn’t ignore the customers
Outstanding customer service skills – someone who actually is nice to the customers
People person - flirt
Outside marketing – door-to-door sales
Investment opportunity – you pay us to work for us
Bilingual – Hablas espanol?
Work at home – rip off
Producer – sales
Computer skills – you need to know more than how to get on Facebook and play World of Warcraft
Account manager – sales
Part-time – partial paycheck
Full-time – 60+ hour weeks
Receptionist – answer phones, type, file, make coffee, make copies, pick up dry cleaning, watch the boss’s kids, set up tee times, and make excuses for the boss (among other things)
Field representative – sales
Experienced – laid off by our competitors
Must have reliable transportation. – Don’t even think about missing work.
Management experience – good at telling people where to go
Nursing assistant – change bedpans
Pilot – able to sit for long periods and push buttons
Agent – sales
Motivated – able to look busy
Send resume. Do not apply in person. – Don’t call us. We’ll call you.
Now get out there and jump into the job market! Good luck with your job search and if feel free to post your own tips at reading employment ads here.
Please follow, comment, and pass along!
Fort Myers FL
June 19, 2010